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By Kendra Davis

On Being a Therapist Part 2 – How do you do it?

People ask me, “How do you do what you do?” They say, “I couldn’t sit with people all day long and listen to their stories, worries and woes. How do you not bring it home with you? I just don’t know how you do it?” For me being a therapist is kind of like being an oceanic surfer. Surfing is all about balance, flexibility, finding your sweet spot and knowing the terrain.

Like the ocean, to be a great therapist, you have to be in it to really feel what it’s like. Sometimes when I am in a session, I have to lose myself in the session to fully understand what is happening for the person I am working with. Sometimes after a session I am wrung out like I just swam a few miles. I have to find a way to reset before the next person walks in the door. Other times, I get out of a session and I feel refreshed and energized!
Every session has its own terrain. The tide and waves are constantly changing. I have to have a lot of flexibility to shift from session to session. Every person deserves the same energy, spirit and skill from me. Like a seasoned surfer, I have gotten used to reading the weather so to speak, knowing when the ocean might be a bit too rough for my skill set. I have developed the mental muscles and balance to do a better job of riding the wave. I listen to the signals from my body and emotional self to help me know what I am capable of that day. Sometimes I have to make adjustments. Sometimes I have to engage in more self-care.
I know where my sweet spot lives and I know better than to try and be good at everything. I am a trauma specialist, I know how to explore, navigate and treat trauma in a safe and effective way. I understand post-traumatic stress, complex trauma and the dissociation that is common for people who have trauma histories. I know how to navigate this terrain. Can I also treat other common mental health issues like depression, anxiety and grief? I can and do every day. I even venture into things like bi-polar disorders, personality disorders and OCD and I do this with confidence. However, there are many many issues that I refer to fellow therapists, both in and outside of my practice. Some examples would be eating disorders and early childhood disorders.
It really comes down to finding balance. In any other job, the person doing the job has to figure out what works for them, how long they can do the work in a day, when their peak hours of performance are, what is beyond their scope of practice, etc. I try to find that balance and keep myself in that sweet spot on the surfboard as often as I can. I have good days and hard days. I have days where I just can’t find my balance and days when things seem to flow so well it’s almost magical. It’s all about finding a way to ride that wave that works for me.
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Today, thanks to the therapy services I received, I live a life full of gratitude and confidence. I embrace my imperfections and approach life with resilience, knowing that mistakes are part of the journey. What brings me the most fulfillment is being able to offer therapy services that help others find the same sense of peace, joy, and empowerment. I am here to listen to your story and help you create the life you truly deserve.